More protection found in breastmilk!

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/03/science/03milk.html?ref=health

Article on vaccines

http://www.wired.com/magazine/2009/10/ff_waronscience

A brilliant article about vaccinations and the anti-vaccine movement.

ACOG (finally) recommends VBACs

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/07/22/health/22birth.html?_r=1&th&emc=th

Yes, I know, little love for my readers recently. What can I say, I'm in full Nesting mode and tiring myself out too much to come up with coherent sentences. So here's something for you. I promise, you're not forgotten!

Pitocin Not FDA approved for elective inductions

http://www.birthroutes.com/2010/05/pitocin-not-approved-by-the-fda-for-elective-or-nonmedical-inductions-.html

I have a feeling most doctors don't want their patients to know this.

Midwives can practice in New York State again

As of last Wednesday (June 30), the New York State assembly passed a law that midwives no longer need to have practice agreements with doctors in order to deliver babies. This was vehemently apposed by ACOG (surprise, surprise), but was the right thing to do. Where I live there aren't any formal relationships between the licensed midwives that I work with and any obs. And I don't think that there needs to be. If there is an emergency, a laboring woman will go to a hospital, having a formal agreement with an ob doesn't change this at all. Anyway, I'm thrilled for all of the woman who will now have better access to midwifery care in the state.

Here is an article that has a snippet about it: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/07/02/nyregion/02albany.html?scp=1&sq=midwives%20in%20new%20york&st=cse

Red Raspberry Leaf Tea

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_raspberry_leaf

I asked my midwife at my last appointment (last Thursday) about drinking Red Raspberry Leaf tea as I had heard about it on a natural childbirth board. Basically I was told it couldn't hurt. So last Sunday I stopped off at Whole Foods and bought three boxes, two Traditional Medicine brand and one Yogi Tea brand. The Traditional Medicine is just 100% RRL, the Yogi Tea has a bunch of other stuff in it, including mint. Right now, I'm liking the plain tea the best. It tastes almost like black tea, but without the caffeine. I usually drink it straight, but it's not bad with some honey, either. The benefits are that it's high in a bunch of vitamins (see Wiki site), and since I need to keep my fluids up, this is another way to do that. So I'm drinking a liter of tea, and trying to get in a liter of water, plus whatever milk I drink. I'm doing better some days than others. Anyway, I'll go ahead and recommend the tea, as I can't find any negatives to drinking it.

Back pain & Belly support

I've been wearing a belly support belt for about three weeks now. Unfortunately, it also irritates my skin because it attaches to itself with velcro, and it doesn't line up perfectly. So I have a couple of open sores on my belly now. I know, totally gross. So for the last two days I've been skipping the belt to give my poor skin a chance to heal. Now my back is killing me. So I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. And I'll also probably put the support belt back on because the sores don't hurt very much, but my back does. Oh, the things nobody warns you about when you get pregnant! However, since my back pain is caused because I carry 99% in my belly (ie: you cannot tell from behind that I'm pregnant), I cannot complain about that. Only about seven weeks to go. I can deal.

Yet another article advocating for midwifery care!

http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/editorial_opinion/oped/articles/2010/06/28/the_high_cost_of_caesareans/

You would think hospitals/ACOG might pay attention (don't hold your breath!!).

A clear sign to switch from an ob's practice

http://birthingbeautifulideas.com/?p=1922

This is a blog post about an ob practice in Ohio that has banned doulas and individual birth plans. The scariest part about it is not that the practice is requiring patients to sign off on their rules, but that many other practices feel the same way, but are not as upfront about it. I didn't get far enough along in my last pregnancy to discuss a birth plan with the ob practice I started with, but due to everything that lead to my leaving them, I have a feeling that they might have been just as unbending, just not as open about it.

While I would highly recommend any woman with a healthy pregnancy to seek out midwifery care instead of a doctor, I also understand that even for the most ardent natural birth supporters this isn't always possible (at the very least, insurance issues can make this a no-go right from the start). If you must be with an ob, I would then suggest speaking from very early on plans for a natural birth. There are some telling signs if the ob is less than supportive of this. Things such as their c-section rate, epidural rate, and how long they're willing to let you go past your due date (ACOG recommends induction at 43 weeks, not the 41 currently practiced the majority of the time). And remember, it is never too late to switch to a health care provider that you feel more comfortable with!

Self Magazine & natural birth

http://www.self.com/health/2010/07/birthing-plan-controversies

Braxton-Hicks

While I am thrilled to bet getting them, and have for the past few weeks, something I was not told prior to this pregnancy is that they are more painful and start earlier the second time around (or can be). So it kind of freaked me out the first few times. I had them for the last two months of my first pregnancy and it was really neat to have proof that my body was getting ready. This time, if I have a couple in a row, I start getting a little freaked out, too. But, I'm trying to consciously choose instead to concentrate on relaxing and breathing through them: they're practice contractions, so I'm practicing my method of dealing with the real deal. It's all about staying in the moment.

End note: so a little part of me is also freaked out that if the Braxton-Hicks are more uncomfortable this time, will I know for certain when the real deal starts? I had another dream of a super-fast labor, 23 minutes, but this one didn't go as well as my previous pregnancy dreams. Just that the midwives were really blasse about coming and then I had major breastfeeding issues.

A random blogpost about home births

http://blog.emerson.edu/ploughshares/2010/05/they-used-to-burn-us.html

Has a lovely home birth story and more about New York State's problems with midwives.

Rebuttle to ACOG

http://www.babble.com/winning-homebirth-debate/

Fantastic article showing the skewed point of view of physicians & ACOG and some bits on why homebirth is such a controversial issue in this country.

Stupid ACOG

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/18/nyregion/18midwives.html?th&emc=th

The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists is doing it's darnedest to prevent women from using midwives in New York state. This infuriates me beyond belief. Anyway, have a read and get annoyed, too :).

The Farm

http://babylievmendoza.blogspot.com/2010/05/liev-michael-mendozas-natural-birth-at.html

Ina May Gaskin is the Godmother of Natural, out of hospital births. I really, really should know more about her, but I'm always hearing raves about her books. The Farm is where she lives and practices. The above link is from someone who gave birth on the Farm recently and explains everything much better than I can. So please, read the blog post above, and I promise to do more research :)

Make-up review: Tarte

Yeah, I'm grasping at straws a bit this week, I'm still sick, so please forgive me. Anyway, a while back I got a bunch of Tarte samples from Sephora and since they're a relatively eco-friendly company, I thought I'd write the reviews.

Lip gloss: not too bad. The colors are really sheer (I received 15 glosses for Christmas, plus one more in my sample kit) and don't last a super long time, but they are gloss, after all. I do like the scent and texture; not too sticky and I'm not constantly pulling my hair out of my lips.

Eyeliner: EmphasEYES in black. I really like the liner. It's not super black, but it smudges so nicely and stays put all day. It's also a twist-up, so I don't have to worry about sharpening it and it always has a decent point.

Mascara: Lights, Camera, Lashes! also in black. I'm loving the mascara. I have long, full lashes to begin with, but they're stick straight and not super dark, so this does the job of emphasizing my lashes beautifully and also hasn't clumped, smudged or flaked. And it washes off easily!

Shadow primer: Lifted Natural Eye Primer. My skin is light enough that this works as an under-eye concealer for me, too. It's okay. Actually, it does a really good job of keeping my eyeshadow on (not that I have a huge problem with this), but it does so good of a job that it becomes more difficult to wash off. So if you need a primer, this is great, but otherwise I wouldn't bother.

Primer: Ugh, it smells funny. Not in a "it's gone bad" sort of way, just in a chemically way. Which is probably because it doesn't have any really bad stuff in it to mask smells, but I don't like the smell. However, it does do a good job and my skin feels really smooth.

Mini review

In searching for a petroleum and other evil-stuff free cosmetics I was re-introduced to Origins. I'm not sure whether this is new or they've always been free, but it was a pleasant discovery. So I'm now using (as of Saturday) their new Zero Oil cleanser, A Perfect World for Eyes, and Starting Over moisturizer. It's only been three days, but I'm really loving them. The cleanser is cleaning my combination skin without stripping and the moisturizer isn't making my oily at all. And the textures are good, too! My skin is looking pretty good even if I'm sick and miserable. I think I'll be trying more Origins in the future.

Sick

Ugh, my sniffley toddler has given me his cold. It probably didn't help that I didn't stop getting his slobbery kisses or eating off of his plate, but I'm usually still immune. It's just a sore throat and a little stuffy nose, but I'm miserable. And limited for relief. I'm drinking copious amounts of tea with honey, but that's about it. Hopefully this will only be for a couple of days. I just wish it had started on Friday, instead of Sunday, so my husband could help a bit more. Ah, c'est la vie.

How the Health Bill Helps Pregnant Women

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/06/07/AR2010060703188.html

Bonus post :)

Swollen ankles

Ugh, they're back (imagine in little girl's voice from Poltergeist). I have not been good about putting my feet up the last few days and I am now paying the price for it. My feet and ankles are one mass of swollen flesh, it looks like I just have stumps at the end of my legs, from really old trees. This is a lovely reminder to me to STAY OFF OF MY FEET! Or at least rest for a reasonable amount of time every day. Part of the problem is that I use a laptop, and I am loath to have the computer actually on my lap, close to my baby. Well, I don't have a choice right now, if I want to be on-line at all. (although, I must interject: I went six days without my computer while we were on vacation and didn't really miss it. But if it's plugged in, I feel like I must be checking things!!) So back to the basics: rest, fluids, and listening to my body. Maybe a bath with some salts in the water.

No legal home births in NYC now

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/may/14/home-births-new-york-midwives

Short-sighted gov't interference. Sigh.

I'm back!

Okay, we got back Wednesday night, but I'm still recovering. So a few quick notes on traveling with a toddler. I'd say that this was our most successful trip in terms of #1 sleeping fantastically well and staying on schedule. It helps that there wasn't any type of agenda on our trip, previous ones have been all about seeing people/going to events so I had less schedule control than this time. We also drove, and drove leaving at naptime to and from, which is always better than cross-country flights (even though the last two flights were at night and sleeping was accomplished during most of them). I arranged activities based entirely on what would be of interest to my son: lots of playgrounds, a science museum and an aquarium. So I didn't get to do any of my stuff; there will be plenty of years for that in the future. And another key part: we only did stuff in the morning. I tried to keep the overstimulation to a minimum so activities before lunch, relaxing in the afternoons. This was also for me, but since my naps were routinely interrupted and the mattress was too firm to be comfortable for me, this didn't help much. It also helped that we were upgraded at the hotel to a two-bedroom suite so #1 had his own room, but that's not something I can count on all of the time (it does make me want to splurge for extra rooms whenever possible, though!!). Oh, and my baby slept in a bed the whole time and did quite well in it. He's growing up! sniff, sniff!

More news story

Part 2 from yesterday: http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/95233234.html?page=1&c=y&elr=KArksUUUycaEacyU

I haven't had a chance to read it yet, but good stuff about midwives :)

Vacation!!

My husband has a work trip in Vancouver, BC, so my darling son and I will be going with him! Hurray for a vacation. I'm also excited for #1 to travel internationally (okay, not that he'll remember, but I will). I love traveling, especially with my baby and this will be the first time my husband will actually be with us, even if he'll be working most of the time. Anyway, so I'll probably be taking a blog break until next Thursday. I'll have my laptop with me, but no guarantees.

Relaxin

Fun, fun, fun. Your pregnant body comes up with all sorts of hormones to keep you on your toes. My latest development is that I've noticed my joints are looser. Relaxin is the hormone released by your body to help it stretch: your cervix, your pelvis, your hips. Too bad it can't just target those areas. As you go later in your pregnancy, heavy exercise is usually discouraged, and this is why. You don't want to be running heavily (unless you already do regularly), or any other jarring activity (tennis, for example) when your joints are a bit wobbly. The last two mornings I've woken up feeling like a rag doll, as though my limbs are a bit looser. Then I remembered.

Today I also broke out my belly support. It's almost like a weight-lifting belt, but to support your stomach instead of your back. I carry ALL in my belly, so this was essential last time. My husband has been asking me about it for a few weeks now, but it's annoying to put on, so I was resisting. I figure it's time now. Overall, my body is still doing better at this point than it was with #1. Who says girls are more difficult??

Another article about births

http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/health/95188129.html?elr=KArksUUUycaEacyU

Just throwing it out there. It's a Part 1, so hopefully I'll remember to look up the next part :)

The things we take for granted . . .

The other day I was taking something out of the oven when I realized that I didn't have to bend over for it. Since I can barely bend anymore, and I can only squat so much in one day, this is a huge deal. My kitchen was designed by me and I have a double oven. Which means that the top one is just at the right height for me to reach in without having to bend at all. And my countertops are high enough that everything is at a perfect level (I'm not super tall, but I am 5'9" and regular countertops are a little low for me). I might be standing away from my sink, but it's still at a good level. Even the banister on our stairs is two inches higher than normal, which makes it at a better height for me. All of these little things add up to less back strain for poor pregnant me. I had realized that although my lower back is starting to get a little achey on me, this is a good three or four months later than back pain started with #1. It might help that I'm not sitting at a desk all day, or that I've already done physical therapy for back problems once this pregnancy (plus last pregnancy), or that I'm much more aware and careful, but whatever it is, I'm grateful for it! So here's to the little things in life that make pregnancy less miserable!

VBAC comic

http://atlanta.ican-online.org/?page_id=82

This is absolutely hilarious, and unfortunately much too true.

The price of vanity

Here's a tip, ladies: keep up with the waxing! Not having an income, and not having worn a bathing suit since well before #1's birth, I have been very lax with the bikini waxes. In fact, it has been nearly a year since my last one. We're going on vacation this week, and the hotel has a pool, so here was an excellent excuse to get back into the habit. That and I am vain enough to want to be presentable during childbirth (because I'm sure that that is the only thing my midwife will think about). OOOOOOOWWWWWWWW! Getting a bikini wax after not having one for a while is painful, and can lead to some bleeding. Now add in six months of pregnancy. My poor, violated skin is still slightly swollen, and there isn't really anything I can do about it. Maybe sitting on some ice. Anyway, my vanity is such that I still think it was worth it, but I also made another appointment in four weeks, because this time I will not let things go for so long.

Oh, and I don't mind if you're laughing at me, I am too, even through the pain.

Long weekend?

Okay, not really a good excuse, just that I haven't had a lot to say and I've been tuckered out! But, my husband and I made a lot of progress on our house projects this weekend, I think the biggest one being that we bought a ton of furniture today: all new bedroom furniture for #1's room (a big-boy bed, I'm a little sad about that) and a new couch for our entertainment room. Got to love the Memorial Day sales! They'll be arriving in 4-6 weeks, which gives us time to get the carpets cleaned and windows washed (it's a two story house, we pay someone for this-inside & out! [we do everything else ourselves!!]) before setting up the new stuff. I'm partially excited and partially terrified by how much money we just spent (even though we did have it saved for this very purpose, I still hate spending money on big stuff). Overall, however, I'm feeling much better about how much we've gotten done now. Only about ten weeks left!!

Not tonight

I'm wiped out. My husband was on another work trip (fortunately, he got sick this afternoon and made it home before eight tonight!) and Ivan the Terrible was here in full force. And last night's good idea for a dessert: real hot chocolate with skim milk ended up having just enough caffeine and sugar to keep me up past midnight. So no bon mots from me tonight. Tomorrow is another day!

Natural Birth conquers another site!

Since my avatar is the same, I'm probably not revealing too much to say I'm a huge fan of the Nest & the Bump (outgrowths of the uber-popular website the Knot). I've met a lot of wonderful women on the boards, many of whom I've actually met in real life, and many, many more that I hope to one day. Anyway, as of today, there is finally a Natural Birth board. I am so very, very excited! It is yet another outlet for women who want to find out about, talk about, encourage and commiserate over going the route that few in this country do (seriously, about 90% of births in this country are medicated, CRAZY!!!). I hope that as someone who has already gone through this, I can be of help to the first-timers. And if any of them are visiting my blog for the first time today, I say welcome here, too!

(and for those of you who haven't ever been on the Nest or the Bump, I say give it a try if you like having an internet support group for life in general)

Sleep conundrum

I am exhausted. #1 has been thankfully sleeping through the night on a regular basis again and sleeping past seven in the morning, and I am still exhausted. I was taking naps nearly every day, but I then it was taking me forever to fall asleep at night. Like up to two hours. Which kind of negates the nap. So I'm back to skipping naps, although I still take it easy in the afternoon while my son takes his. I function a little better in the evenings with the nap, but since I don't seem to actually get any more sleep overall, I'd rather have the free time in the afternoon. Fortunately, my next midwife appointment includes some bloodwork to determine if maybe I'm deficient in D or iron. It would be kind of nice if it were that simple. In the mean time, my husband is on work travel. Again. (but for the last time until after birth at least)

I feel pretty!

Or at least I did for the afternoon. I shaved, did full make-up, did my hair, put on a lovely (pink) outfit, and met a friend for formal afternoon tea and a chick flick. Then I came home, pulled my hair back, and put my regular clothes back on. I love, love, love being a stay at home mom. I love being pregnant and that I'm creating another life inside of me. But, oh, I do miss dressing up on a regular basis (even if just for work). My husband and I in general are homebodies (well, we're frugal, and it's easier to be frugal if you stay at home), so it's not like I had a wild social life before settling down with child(ren). But we did at least get really dressed up a few times a year for an "event". Where we live now doesn't really have a lot of "dress-up" events and I sorely miss them. I'm an anachronism and would be perfectly happy to have to "dress" for dinner every night (you know, one that was prepared by the cook and served by the maids/butler). But then again, the grass is always greener. Anyway, it was nice to have my afternoon fantasy, be a girly girl and have a break. And I can't wait until my children are old enough to share the experience with them.

Drop-side cribs to be banned by end of year

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/05/21/AR2010052103254.html

We bought a convertible crib for #1 and I had never considered a drop-side one. Anything that has moving parts around an infant makes me nervous. I guess I was right in that worry. 32 infants have died since 2000 directly from the cribs, which can pose a strangulation or suffocation hazard. If you already have one, see if you can take it back (if it's older, it may have been recalled anyway). If you haven't bought a crib yet, then make sure to not get one with moving parts. And if you're short and are worried about being able to reach your baby, there are cribs that are lower to the ground :).

Can't bend over anymore

One of the most difficult things about this pregnancy is having a toddler. Things that I avoided last time I cannot this time around. Like bending over. I'm trying to limit it as much as possible, but really, I can't squat for everything (plus squatting always requires a readjustment of pants afterward). The worst is that my angelic (hahahaha!) twenty-month-old fully realizes that Mommy is impaired, and is taking full advantage of that. I cannot always chase him around his room every time I need to change his diaper, so unfortunately, that results in me sitting down and waiting for him to come over to me when he's good and ready. Not the type of discipline I really wanted. Sigh. Even simple things like putting groceries away result in lasting pain. At least for laundry I've learned to prop up the laundry basket while I'm putting things into the washer for less bending.

Another issue is that my babygirl is sitting really, really low. Most people think it's an old wives tale that boys are high and girls are low, but both of my babies have been obviously one or the other (with my son, older women used to come up to me at the store or wherever and tell me I was having a boy, regardless of whether I actually wanted to know this, which I didn't). It means that I have to move differently than I did with #1. I can't explain it, exactly, it's just very different. And a lot more pressure on my cervix. Which will happen anyway. But, at least for me, it has held true that every pregnancy is different.

Scared after watching a birth(?)

An on-line community that I take part in had a post from one of the pregnant women today. She had seen a birth in her birthing class last night and was now terrified. Yes, the first time (or first several times) you see that birth it can be really traumatic. Especially depending on the video (seeing the women in labor screaming first doesn't help). But, I highly, highly recommend getting over this by watching more, and more, and more births. Watching until it's no longer shocking and seems commonplace. It's totally not the same as being there for a birth (particularly your own), but the more normal it seems, the less it will shock you when it's your turn, too. This was one of the many, many things I loved about my Bradley class, we watched a TON of births. Natural births. And honestly, watching a medicated birth kind of freaks me out more. And if you want nightmares, watch a c-section. I wish they made all women watch those as well as a natural birth in those "education" classes that hospitals run.

The only birth movies that I've seen that Netflix has are The Business of Being Born which is more about the industry than about births and doesn't have the best birthing examples, and Orgasmic Birth which I just watched two weeks ago and is fantastic. Lots of beautiful, natural births. Home births, hospital births, supportive, loving births (and no crotch shots, so less disturbing for the uninitiated). There is also the medicated birth, but don't worry, it's not balanced at all. I'd love to hear of more if anyone has any suggestions in the comments.

And as a parting thought: WHO (World Health Organization) recommends a c-section rate of about 10%, which means that 90% of women can have healthy, unmedicated births without any problems. It's your body, and your body knows what it's doing.

Embarassing stuff that WILL happen

First, let's talk about wet sneezes. No, I don't mean when you spray saliva and mucus everywhere, I'm talking about when the sneeze causes you to lose control of your bladder for a moment. Even if you are the Kegel queen, they can still happen toward the end when you've got a 6,7,8 lb baby pushing his/her head down on your bladder. There is only one thing that you can do to have minimal damage: pressure in the opposite direction (ie: mainly sitting down). If you can, try to sit, or at least cross your legs if you're standing (like in an elevator), this can help a lot. The other thing is to always wear a pantiliner. While plenty of pregnancy books will advocate letting as much air circulation as possible, and only cotton underwear, I've got to admit, I'd rather save my clothes/furniture/rug. Plus, I'm already so wet from discarge that I really can't go without. One of my favorite quotes is from the Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy saying it's like a tropical rainforest between your legs. Truer words were never writ.

Second, we've got hemorroids. Even if you avoid them during your pregnancy because you're great about getting enough fiber and being regular, there's a very good chance you will get them during labor because of all that fantastic pushing you will do. They're gross, mildly uncomfortable and can be itchy. So, add the hemorroids from my first pregnancy (which, by the way, can apparently be taken care of with an easy laser procedure that nobody told me about until I was pregnant again) with my all-to-frequent intenstinal distress and my poor bottom is a mess. One of my midwives suggested diaper balm. Not a bad idea, but my son's makes his bottom smell like lavender. A treat when changing his diapers, but not what I wanted for me. So I'm using belly balm. Oh, my, goodness, it is working so well to soothe! But in general, if it's good enough for baby's bottom, it should be good enough for yours as well.

My arms are too short!

Washing dishes this evening, I was incredibly uncomfortable. It took me a minute to realize it was because I was standing about five feet from the sink and reaching. Yep, the belly is big enough that I can no longer stand close to things. Fortunately, I have long arms, unfortunately, I still have a big belly. This will get much worse before it gets better. I think my husband was doing all clean-up at this point last time around. Oh, well, I'll deal. Oh, and the belly is also regularly getting wet (when dish-washing) and food on it. Although sometimes I'll attribute that to my son, not me. Not that I can blame him for smearing me with food, since my lap is increasingly getting smaller and smaller (although he still hasn't noticed that he gets kicked on a regular basis).

Cankles update: as long as I stay off of my feet, they're not as bad. Too bad that doesn't happen frequently. I also suspect that I have low blood pressure like last time. Which means a suggestion of consuming more salt. Which doesn't help much with the swelling, but I'd rather have swollen ankles than faint!

Best countries to be a mother?

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/18/health/18glob.html?ref=health

Few surprises here: Norway is the best, Afghanistan is the worst and the US is 28th out of the 160 countries surveyed. Actually, I was surprised that we were so high. The rankings were determined based on maternal health (how many mothers died due to childbirth, but not necessarily in childbirth) and maternity benefits, amongst others. We have a ridiculously high maternal death rate in this country, partially due to the lack of prenatal healthcare for poor women. We are below all of the countries of Western Europe. We also have some of the worst maternity benefits in the world. Heck, Cuba tends to do better than we do (although the article did not mention where we are ranked in relation to Cuba) due to their support of training enough doctors. What can you do about this? Be an educated health care consumer, take care of yourself, and use a midwife instead of an ob.

My mother's day

Since my husband was gone last week, I finally got my mother's day today. It was pretty good. Omelet for breakfast, the New York Times print edition, and a day to spend on the couch reading. I'm even still in my bathrobe. This will probably be the last day like this for at least another year (if not two), so I just soaked up the relaxation. And husband even made an appointment for me to get a facial and massage next week. Back to reality tomorrow.

Projects done??

I've written extensively about this but, I'll do it again anyway: get as much stuff done as soon as possible so that you have some time to relax before baby comes. Obviously nearly everyone will need to get a baby's room done, and sometimes that means waiting for baby showers to finish up. But anything else you have planned around the house, get it done quickly! Last time, it was painting our house (since I got pregnant a month after we moved in). This time it's building built-in bookcases and finally (after way too long), getting my books organized. Well, the shelves are officially done as of this afternoon!!! I've got all of the fiction (about half the total) organized, now comes the more difficult part of organizing the non-fiction (Dewey Decimal, of course). But, what a sense of relief to have the heavy lifting done! I'm about to enter the third trimester and while we still need to buy new furniture for #1, move baby furniture into #2's nursery and get a few others things done, they are all relatively short & easy projects by comparison. I might get to relax this time after all!

More on drug recalls

http://money.cnn.com/2010/05/14/news/companies/tylenol_recall_plant_conditions/

I'm horrified by the breakdown of safety measures at Johnson & Johnson.

Just, don't

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/05/14/AR2010051404324.html?hpid=artslot

See above for definition of bad parenting, poor choice and one way to messed up children. (article is about a YouTube video of seven year old girls doing a highly inappropriate dance routine)

Sick baby

Okay, so toddler, presumably the baby is fine. Unlike pretty much every other mom I know, I have little experience in this. I've been super lucky that my toddler has been really sick twice: when he was four and a half months old (two weeks before the end of my working) he picked up RSV from daycare and gave it to me and my husband. Since I had two weeks left of work, daddy stayed home from work to take care of him and I dragged myself into work half dead. Then there was swine flu. My son was fine after two days, and we know what happened to me. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed that 1. the illness is fast and 2. that I don't get it.

Right now he's just feverish (yay, nothing to give him for that, thanks McNeill Pharmaceuticals!!) with a slightly runny nose and super, super clingy. He did not want me to put him down from when he got up from his nap. Made making dinner for company tonight a snap. I'll check his temperature again in the morning and give him a cool (bubble) bath if it hasn't gone down yet. And my husband gets home tomorrow afternoon. He was THRILLED to hear about the cold.

Latest on single-motherhood

My husband usually takes care of the bedtime routine: bath, story, good-night! Since he's been away, I do it all. Hmm, bending over a bathtub with a big belly is not so comfortable! I discovered tonight that all that bending is a one-way ticket to heartburn! Fortunately, my heartburn this pregnancy hasn't been that bad, and it's always directly caused by me (ie: 100% preventable), but this was just really annoying! So, not bending over a lot is on the list now, but sometimes it's hard to avoid.

An update on the on-line nutrition information that's available for chain restaurants: Today is my parents' 37th wedding anniversary. So what better way to celebrate than by going to a nasty chain? (my mother gets gift cards at work for good performance reviews, I really wish she'd pick something else) Anyway, I was at least able to go on-line for both menu options and to check the calories. Double-win. I wouldn't say I had the healthiest meal, but it was relatively compared to the rest of the options and it also meant I knew what to order for my toddler (and what to bring to supplement) before we went. Hurray for information!!

Sixth Midwife Appointment

(I think it's the sixth) Anyway, not too much going on today. Baby is moving lots, which is great. My blood pressure is fine (I'm assuming, she forgot to tell me the numbers today), urine tests normal, etc. This was the first time I've been to an appointment without my husband. I should have made a list, because there were a couple of things that I forgot to talk about since he wasn't there. I love having an involved husband, but it doesn't mean that I want him to hear all of my questions. He's told me that I can kick him out of the room, but that feels wrong, too. Regardless, I had my toddler with me today (100% so that I could take HOV lanes home, otherwise the fifteen minute trip could have taken an hour) and he freaked out when they pulled out the stethoscope since he currently has a medical phobia so this kind of cut things short. I felt so bad for my baby screaming at the thought that Mommy might be hurt (or that he was next, I'll go with the former). So not the best appointment, but many more to come, so I won't feel like I missed out on too much.

One thing that I did mention was my continuing exhaustion, which most likely is due to #1 rarely sleeping through the night. So next time they'll do bloodwork to check my iron and Vitamin D levels. I'm guessing though that it is purely related to poor sleep.

Single motherhood

I occasionally get a taste of what it's like to be a single parent when my husband goes on work travel. I don't know how people do it indefinitely. The work I can handle, I am, after all, taking care of my son all day by myself every day. It's the knowing that I don't get a break, ever. Most days my husband pretty much takes over a little bit before dinner, giving me enough time to cook dinner, and then he feeds our son (well, I'm the one who still jumps up for anything that's needed, but at least I'm not the one sitting directly in front of the high chair) and puts him to bed doing the whole routine: bath, story, the works. This is usually my time to clean the kitchen and then blog and read e-mail. Even thought the bulk of my time is spent cooking and cleaning up, I still cherish that time in the evening where I don't have to be 100% aware of what my son is doing (just about 20% aware). If I have a bad day with Ivan the Terrible, I have some one to share it with and know that maybe I'll get a bit more of a break that day, or the next. I usually get to stay in bed one morning over the weekend. All of this adds up to enough little breaks that I can handle the days of exploding diapers, fussy eating and no naps. So, if you're not already knocked up: make sure that before you do that you have a support network in place! And if you're a single parent, well, G-d bless you, for I don't know how you do it!

Happy Mother's Day!

I hope all of you mommies and mommies-to-be have had a spectacular day. My day will be next Sunday, as my fabulous husband's not-so-fabulous job sent him on travel starting at 9 am this morning. I see a spa day in my future!

Baby getting hurt

It will inevitably happen, your precious, perfect baby will fall, tumble, slice and dice him or herself (sometimes with our help, but usually without). Even the most hovering and careful of parents cannot prevent it. Particularly once your toddler is running around. The best way to deal with it (for yourself) is to just get ready to see it happen. You are not a bad parent when Baby trips and falls against a piece of furniture and his bottom teeth go through his lip. You are not a bad parent when Baby suddenly jerks while you're cutting his nails and his finger gets nipped a bit. You are, however, a bad parent if you either 1) get so worked up over blaming yourself that you cannot comfort your hurt baby or 2) are so overprotective of your baby that you don't give him a chance to grow, and hurt himself again. (You are also a bad parent if you don't slow down your life and pay attention more if baby is getting hurt more than normal, or due to some mild negligence) Remember, this is just practice for when your child starts growing up and can really get into some scrapes!

More on the Cancer Panal Report

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/06/opinion/06kristof.html?th&emc=th

The simple pleasure of simple food

Today's lunch was sliced tomatoes and sliced mozzarella, drizzled with balsamic vinegar and olive oil and sprinkled with salt and pepper. It took about five minutes to make and tasted of spring. I've been craving this (with one opportunity to eat it a few weeks ago in a restaurant) all winter. I'm not even a tomato-lover, but there is something about this combination that is so yummy. Spring does this to me. I've been gobbling down the first strawberries (now that there are actually ripe ones in the stores) and could eat asparagus daily (although it's been more like once a week since I like it so much more than my husband does). Eating seasonally makes ripe, fresh fruits and vegetables taste so much better. Part of it is they do taste better when local and picked fresh, but it also makes you appreciate food when you know you can only get it for a limited time. I refuse tomatoes when they're out of season (except for that one restaurant meal, but the tomatoes were at least grown in a greenhouse and ripe-ish). Same with strawberries, asparagus, berries, stone fruits and any other identifiable seasonal food. I try to only eat salmon when it's salmon season because I'd rather buy it fresh off the boat (and yes, I actually know where I can buy it from the boat-hands). I stay away from corn on the cob until high summer. No, I'm not perfect, I've admitted to buying some fruit from Latin American countries to relieve the boredom of apples and pears, but overall, I'm trying (and admittedly some are easier to do, peaches do not taste good if they're not from nearby, but I grew up with a peach tree and am spoiled). My point is more than just buying local and in season: it's also that when you buy what tastes best, you're more likely to eat it. And who can argue with buying the best fruits and vegetables?

Going Organic, it's not just about you

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/05/06/AR2010050603813.html?hpid=moreheadlines

Basically, the world we live in is a toxic cesspool. There is no way that an individual can eliminate all of the toxins in their environment, but anything that you can do to limit your exposure and creation of more is a good thing. So: buy organic (everything that you can afford, start with food, move on to clothes, if you can). But buy less. Clean with non-toxic cleaners (better yet, make your own, although I'll admit that I'm not there yet), and use less. Grow (some) of your own food; nothing says local like your back yard. Drive less. Do, less. I know, I'm repeating myself, but the idea that fetal cord blood has toxins in it freaks me out. We want to do everything that we can to protect our children and sometimes that also means doing less (stuff).

As if I needed more evidence . . .

http://health.yahoo.com/news/reuters/us_children_tv.html

TV is bad, bad, bad, bad, bad for babies, toddlers and children (heck, it's not all that great for adults, either)! There is no reason for them to be watching it. My son stays occupied just fine with his toys and books, I don't buy the "but I just need half an hour to get something done" excuse. Children do learn how to entertain themselves, plopping them in front of the tv only delays or prevents that skill from being learned. I feel as though I am the only holdout, other mommy friends that I have all say "well, I always said that I wasn't going to let my child watch tv, but it's just so necessary . . ." NO IT'S NOT!!! I get into this argument on a regular basis with my husband (and semi-regular with my mother). I know that once my babies are over at other people's homes on a regular basis visiting friends I will have less control, but I have complete control now and will not relent. Hmm, I feel a little bit better now.

Oh, and if you're not bothered by your child's brain rotting from watching the boob tube, at least have them watch non-commercial channels or videos, the commercials are just as harmful as the programming (can we say sugar cereal, McDonald's and every unimaginative toy that is out there???).

Oregon has lowest rates of childhood obesity

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/05/03/AR2010050303132.html

Some promising news in the fight against obesity, and some not so. There hasn't been a proven causation as to why Oregon has a rate of only 9% (vs national 16%, and this is for obesity, it doesn't include just the overweight) but they think that one factor may be that the state has a high rate of breastfeeding. Oregon also has the best employer laws: women who are breastfeeding are entitled to pumping breaks (this was before the Health Care bill was signed) and I want to say that they're paid breaks, too. Other factors may be that they require chain restaurants to post nutritional information (also in health bill), and it is more of an outdoorsy state (ie: more physical activity). Unfortunately, what might be the biggest contributing factor is that the state is 90% white, and minorities tend to have higher rates of obesity.

What I'll take from the survey is that there are several things that have passed in the national health care bill that Oregon was already doing, so hopefully that might help a bit on a national scale. (The other thing that might help is to make everyone across the country food snobs that want fresh food from local sources, which is pretty prevalent all through the Pacific Northwest.)

Recalls!

As a parent, you're constantly bombarded with potential hazards that your children can face, but none are more upsetting than product recalls. We trust the companies that we buy from (or at least should be able to) and it's horribly upsetting to find out that your baby's crib, favorite toy, or painkiller that is the only thing soothing teething is suddenly dangerous. You also can become anxious worrying about everything you buy (just don't go down this road, it's not worth the ulcers). The best way to keep track is just follow the news. BabyCenter does a pretty good job of sending out alerts for products. I usually will get an e-mailed update within a day of a product recall. Friends are the ones I usually end up hearing about the latest Tylenol recall (yes, two this year alone!). Since big recalls are big news, if at least one of the parents keeps track of current events, you should be okay. Although, just in general, try to avoid toys that have questionable manufacturing (what, made in China? just say NO!). The more simply a toy is made (wooden stacking toys, for example) the better for your child's development and the less likely that it will harm your child. (Ignore the grandparents outcry, this is your child and YOU control what they play with/sleep in/eat!!)

Vitamin D recommendations increased for Pregnant Women

http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/04/30/vitamin.d.pregnancy/index.html

Oh, it's been a few days. Sorry about that, I'll do two tonight :)

CNN posted an article a couple of days ago about recent studies showing that pregnant women need more Vitamin D than previously thought. Right now the RDA is 400IU and the study had women take up to 4000IU, yeah, big difference. At my first midwife appointment she recommended that I add a 2000IU supplement. It's recommended that midwives or obs do a blood test to see if their patient is low in Vitamin D, but as my midwife put it, everyone is, it's a $150 test, and $150 will buy a LOT of supplements.

This isn't based on anything I've read, but I'm willing to bet that there are two main contributors to why most of the population is now D deficient (I'm thinking that this is also why the recommendations are suddenly changing): change in food production & change in outdoor time. People spend much, much less time outside now than they ever have before, and scheduled outdoor time frequently (and should ALWAYS) include sunscreen. I have a history of skin cancer in my family, and am pale enough to glow in the dark, I don't leave my bathroom in the morning without sunscreen on my face, at least. The other big reason is that we're getting less D from our food. Animals produce Vitamin D in the sunlight as well, and this can be found in products such as milk and eggs (I'm not sure about the content in actual meat). As most of our animals are now being raised indoors (heck, so chickens never even see the light of day), they're D production has also plummeted. Another excellent reason to only buy products from animals that have lived outdoors!

So, talk to your midwife, ob or dr. and ask about the new recommendations!

Saying no

I'm not talking about to your child(ren), that should be fairly easy. I mean to other people. It's a good habit to get into while you're pregnant, not taking on too much, letting people down easy, prioritizing you and your family. If you're a Type A personality, then you will resist this, because, you've always pushed forward and gotten things done. But it is really, really important because you will have to slow down at least immediately after your child is born. The whole point of having children is to raise them, right? So you will want to actually be able to witness as much of Baby's growth as possible. Believe me, it happens so fast you blink and it's over (a big reason I desire to have more, I hope that after three kids or so, it will feel like I've actually experienced their childhood instead of blinking). I don't mean that women shouldn't have high-powered jobs, absolutely they should, but if at all possible, try to power back for a few years at least. The economy and business environment might make this at least seem impossible, but for women who want it all, there has to be a way to have a more flexible life. Obviously, this didn't work out so well for me, but a lot of companies would rather keep a good employee, even at 32 (or twenty, I can dream, right?) hours a week, than get rid of her.

But it's more than just work. It's also outside commitments. I previously wrote about how important it is to volunteer and be active in your community, but it is just as important to set boundries, particularly in unpaid positions, so that you are not being run right over when you least feel like it. Delegate, when possible, if you're at a point where you cannot do as much. Like later points in pregnancy and right after birth. You can always pick up volunteering later. The most important thing is to listen to your body, and listen to your heart.

Just because it says it's organic . . .

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704464704575208752164666686.html?mod=dist_smartbrief#printMode

doesn't mean you still don't have to pay attention. The big thing is the baby formula. If you end up having to supplement breastfeeding then you should know what you're putting in your baby. I didn't check it out, giving him Similac Organic. Anyway, the way they manufacture DHA is in vats of mold. Yep, mold. I haven't done much research beyond that, but I don't really like the idea of mold being used to synthesize part of my baby's diet. Unfortunately, there aren't many options, but at least you should be an informed consumer.

Fast food and children

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/04/27/AR2010042703768.html

A scary study done several years ago asked preschoolers what they're favorite restaurant was. Overwhelmingly, McDonald's came in first place, even amongst children who had never been there. This, of course, was accomplished by advertising; children who hadn't eaten at McDonald's were still watching enough television to be indoctrinated into American consumer culture. (okay, so a dig about tv as well as bad food) And what is the number one draw to McDonald's? Why the Happy Meal with a toy, of course. Which makes Santa Clara County in California just plain awesome in their attempts to battle childhood obesity by outlawing giving away toys along with unhealthy children's food. Children's meals must be under a certain number of calories, fat, sodium and sugar in order for a toy to be included. The law hasn't passed yet, but we can keep our fingers crossed. Although some (okay, many) will say that the government is being much too big brother-ish, I say good for the county. Children cannot make healthy decisions on their own, it must be done by parents. And too many parents are laying down on the job. I see it as a matter of child welfare to save them from their parents (and yes, I'm willing to go far enough down the zealot route to say feeding kids unhealthy foods all of the time is a form of child abuse, along with smoking around them, and not buckling them up properly in cars). As goes California, goes the nation (heck, I don't even live there anymore, but I'm proud of the various protections the state has enacted!).

Getting your Omega 3s

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/27/science/27qna.html?ref=health

One of the essential nutrients to consume while pregnant is Omega 3 fatty acids, usually found in fish, but also in other sources. Pregnant women are encouraged (usually) to take a supplement to make sure that they get enough. But I have issues with the supplement. How the fish oil is obtained is environmentally suspicious, and apparently the method used to make it for baby formula is that it is produced in vats of mold. Yuck. So I asked about other sources. Of course, eating too much fish (my problem) can lead to other issues (mercury poisoning anyone?), so my midwife suggested flaxseed oil. I'll admit, I have yet to open up my bottle (which is really, really bad of me!) because I'm still traumatized by the cod liver oil my parents made me ingest as a child (they didn't catch on to the capsules for a long time). But I must do this! Above is a link to a New York Times article in tomorrow's Health section about the differences between obtaining the fatty acids from flax vs fish. Basically, you need more oil from flax for your body to convert it properly. But especially if you're a vegetarian, this is a great option to have.

Keeping track of food

As part of the new Health Care Bill, chain restaurants will be required to post nutritional information. A lot of cities (and states, I think) have already started requiring this so a lot of national chains are already in compliance. And while in general, I avoid chains like the plague (unless I'm in the middle of nowhere, then at least they're a known quantity), we do have a chain diner (Ruby's Diner) near us that I love. The waitresses are all really good and love my son, the food is fresh and it's relatively cheap (yeah, I'm justifying a bit, but the service really is spectacular). Anyway, I made the mistake, uh, informed decision, of looking up the nutritional information before going there for breakfast this morning. I know that restaurant food in general is going to be much higher in calories, fat and sodium than my cooking, but what an eye-opener! Anyway, point being, even when we know we're eating food that isn't great for us, we don't always realize just how bad it really is. The new law can help change that. There will always be times for a splurge, but it's good to keep an idea of how big that splurge really is (like, if I weren't pregnant, I'd have to forgo food for a few days to make up for it!). This is important to remember when feeding children, when neither breastfeeding nor pregnant, and when trying to not slip into the majority in this country who are overweight or obese (and with the amount of eating out people do, it's not always hard to see how).

Burping

My lovely topic of conversation tonight is on one of the side effects of having less room for your stomach: more burping. I didn't really experience this last time, but, oh, now I am. Since dinner is usually my largest meal, even when I'm not overdoing it, this is when I feel it the most. I'm not really having heartburn most of the time (thank goodness!), but I'll just start burping nearly non-stop as I'm digesting. I start feeling a little bit of acid in the back of my throat. Then the worst: the burps start bringing up bits of food, too. (This is probably not helped at all by me spending a significant amount of time after dinner hunched over my computer, but this is my ONLY free time of the day, so I'll deal.) I'm sure that there are some fixes, eating less would probably be one of them, but if I stretch out the snacks (which would then be needed) too late, they interfere with my sleeping anyway. Going for a walk after dinner would be a good idea, if I didn't have a sleeping toddler upstairs. So I'm going to just leave it as a complaint and hope I'm not alone with my new development.

Who will take care of baby?

Jumping from schools back down to newborns, what are you going to do with Baby after birth? Hopefully you have the means or the employer that allows you to have a nice maternity leave if you work (if you already stay home, just go ahead and skip this post). But then what? Daycare in some parts of the country can be ridiculously pricey and hard to get into (as in, women get a note from their ob as soon as they are pregnant to get on a waiting list which they then might not get off of until said unborn child is a year old). There are so many choices: in-home, centers, nannies, relatives, etc. All of them have pros and cons, and some of those might not even be apparent until your child starts (like my baby would not sleep at daycare!). There is a lot to think about, and then there can be even more to think about afterward.

Why am I bringing this up? Because once you have that sweet baby in your arms, you're not going to know how you feel about then having to drop him or her off at daycare six, eight, twelve weeks later. I know a lot of women who LOVE their jobs. They've worked hard to get to where they are and don't want to give that up. They also realize that it's an essential part of themselves and to have to not work would be to deny part of themselves. And then they have a baby. This certainly doesn't happen to everyone. But it does happen. Experience starts to change your mind. This doesn't make you a bad person, or a weak woman for deciding that you'd rather stay home, only human because you couldn't imagine something until you were there. I'm only writing this to keep at the very back of your mind, just in case. And, of course, because even though I didn't love-love my job, I certainly expected to go back to it and be able to contribute financially to the family. But I couldn't. It hurt too much to drop my baby off each morning. We also didn't think there was any way, financially, for me to stay home. But we're making it work. It's not easy, particularly in this post-real estate bust, but a lot more people can do it if they really try. I just want to make sure that you soon-to-be mommies know that there are a lot of options out there. And that there are others who feel the same way.*

*There are plenty who also can't wait to go back to work, and that's fine, too! Newborns are not easy in any way shape or form, so I want to make sure that nobody thinks I'm dissing them!

More on school lunches

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/04/20/AR2010042001181.html

Silly me, who doesn't watch television, I forgot that everyone else seems to be tuned into the school lunch issue. Here's an article about Jaime Oliver's show from yesterday's Washington Post's food section (newspapers, I obviously read, if not always right away). I adore Oliver, and not just because he cooks and is cute. He has done a ton of work in Britain to try and fix school lunches there, as well as other charitable causes (like teaching at-risk youths [and I believe recent inmates] for food-industry jobs, etc.). I'm always one to jump late on a celebrity bandwagon. I need them to prove to me that they're worthwhile first (heck, I didn't like Madonna until I read that she didn't let her children watch television). I think Oliver is worthwhile, and it helps that I believe in his causes: cooking for health & family. So if he can get you to care, that's another reason I'll like him.

BTW, PBS showed Food, Inc. last night and now has it on their website. So if you haven't seen it yet, now's your chance to do so for free!

Never to early to be horrified by school lunches

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/04/20/AR2010042000916.html

Taking a look several years into the future: do you know what your kids will be eating in their school lunch? The above article is about the armed services complaining that school lunches are making young adults to fat to join the military. Regardless of whether or not you see your child taking that route, it's pretty hard not to be concerned. Ironically, after World War II the military was the one who got the federal government to institute nutritional standards for school foods after complaining that they were causing malnourishment in potential recruits.

But looking at a time in the closer future: I already hear horror stories of parents whose children imbibe tons of sweets and other junk food at daycare. It is really, really, really hard to counter that environment when children are being immersed in it from such an early age. One of the reasons we chose the daycare we did (even if #1 was only there for nine weeks) was because I had more control over what he was going to eat. What to do? Model what good nutrition is for your children. This is the #1 thing that you can do. Do NOT eat poorly in front of them and then expect them to gobble down the steamed broccoli. Bonus: you'll be more healthy, too. Also, don't let them watch television. Forgetting about the lack of exercise and brain rot sitting in front of the boob tube causes, it's also the constant bombardment of commercials for BAD food that causes problems. If little Timmy doesn't see 5000 McDonald's commercials a week, he's much less likely to bet you to take him there. I could go on, but I'm tired, and I think you've got the point. Eat healthy and remember, you are the parent, so say no to bad food!

Cankles

The swelling has begun. Not as bad (yet) as last time, but not quite pretty, either. So, back to remembering what helped last time. For early ankle swelling (not third trimester, which is pretty unavoidable) that is not caused by hypertension or other serious problems there is a relatively easy fix (and I guess if the easy fix doesn't work, then it's time to check again for a more serious problem): make sure you're getting enough protein and fluids. The fluids are more intuitive since the less water you're drinking, the more likely your body is going to hold on to what you do drink. (too bad this doesn't work with fat too: your body says, oh, you have enough fat now, so any more that you eat we'll just flush out, and probably reduce your stores too, since this isn't going to be a problem) Drinking more lets your body know that you don't need to hold onto fluids. I'm not sure how the protein works, but last time my Bradley Class instructor told me to try it and it worked almost immediately. The swelling in my ankles went down in a couple of days. I noticed my lovely cankles on Saturday (which doesn't mean that they weren't there before, I'm not always the most observant person). It has been warmer outside, but I also haven't been eating as much protein. For some reason, the warmer it is, the lighter the food I eat and that means cutting out some proteins, too. Which isn't good! My staples from pregnancy #1 were cheese & hummus to snack on every afternoon (not together), which are the two things that I have an aversion to right now. So I really, really need to get my Bradley workbook out (tomorrow maybe?) for some suggestions and to actually track my food intake again. It's always a process.

Eat small meals, frequently (or why I didn't post last night)

There are some random things that become more difficult with a second pregnancy that you'd never think of. Last time, I worked in an office and had no problem snacking throughout the day to keep my blood sugar level and avoid eating too much in one sitting. This time, since I'm home with my son, this is proving to be difficult. I can't really snack in front of him, and make it a point to only eat what he can (my husband is bad about this and it causes tons of fussing at dinner time). So by dinner time, I tend to be really hungry. Last night I made a delicious mushroom risotto, and hadn't really eaten much of a lunch, so I was starved and had a plate of one of my favorite foods in front of me. Big mistake. My full sensors weren't working in real time, so by the time I realized that I had had enough, I had had way too much. I spent the next four hours on the couch, in discomfort until I finally got so tired I just had to go to bed, uncomfortable or not. (wow, I sound like such a glutton!!) At least my son had a good night's sleep and so did I. Usually, however, I just don't end up eating enough because I purposely try to avoid the above scenario at dinner time, and just end up being hungry an hour or two later. At least I'm better about snacking after dinner, once my toddler is in bed. Although not always great about what I'm snacking on (my sweet tooth has come back again. I really like it when it goes away!) Anyway, so here's another do as I say, not as I do post. Learn from my mistakes!!!

Web resource

http://www.midwiferytoday.com/

Not being able to come up with anything on my own to write about, I instead am relying on Google for a little help. Midwifery Today is a quarterly magazine for midwives, but the website has a ton of information on it, and at least parts of articles from the magazine. I read a bunch and really liked what is being written about, so I encourage you to take a look. The search function (for midwives, doulas, birth centers, etc.) seems rather limited, but at least it's a start. So it's worth a few clicks, at least.

Fifth Midwife appt

Okay, it was on Tuesday. Not a particularly mind-blowing appointment, just a nice, routine one. We listened to BabyGirl's heartbeat. My blood pressure is its normal low. My urine tests were all neg. (normal) At 22 weeks I'm not experiencing anything unusual. One thing I will add is that my husband makes sure to make it to every single appointment. Which is fantastic, and I'm sure many women would like to have such involved husbands. But I've also realized that there are a couple of things that I'm not entirely comfortable talking about in front of him. Like my complete lack of libido. I mean, he knows about it, but I'd kind of like to talk to my midwife without him around so that I don't feel like I need to apologize for it, too. So as much as I'm ticked off with my darling husband's next work travel (leaving on Mother's Day, for goodness sake!), I am looking forward to having an appointment all to myself that week. I just need to remember that this is the time to talk about everything I want to discuss privately.

One of those weeks

My blog has unfortunately been more at the bottom of my list this week. A variety of factors are just all coming at me causing one stressed momma. So I guess a couple of updates from prior posts since I'm not being very creative right now. I finally got around to buying a new, larger bra (yeah, just one so far). I spent part of date night last Saturday at Macy's and bought the ugliest, oldladiest bra. In a 38D. Before getting pregnant, I couldn't wait for larger breasts. Now I just miss my little 36As. Oh, well, there's always cosmetic surgery when I'm done. I also lucked out and L'Occitane had some Mama and Baby balm. I love this stuff, and I love it even more since I've waited so long to get it. So I stopped using my locally produced solid moisture bar and am sticking with the shea butter. My belly is so soft! BabyGirl also continues to move frequently. My husband has felt her a few times and I'm just waiting impatiently for my son to feel her. I'm sure he'll either be totally nonplussed, or freaked out. But it's exciting for me! I've also been super bad and consumed nearly an entire 1lb bag of Twizzlers. I can't remember the last time I had any, and it will be a long time before I buy them again. Who says crap food will make you feel bad??

Fight for Midwifery law in NY State

http://www.wten.com/Global/story.asp?S=12298092

An article forwarded to me by a friend. Right now, New York requires midwives to practice with an OB instead of independently. The bill, Midwifery Modernization Act, would allow midwives to practice independently, as they do in many other states, including mine. The American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists opposes the bill. So I feel the need to editorialize. Nearly everything that I've read about the ACOG points to them continuously trying to obstruct the practice of midwives. Despite the fact that midwifery care tends to have better results than OB care in non-high risk pregnancies. While there is a reason to go to an ob if you're pregnant (such as, you are at high risk), for most women a midwife would be a healthier, and cheaper option. Unfortunately, due to the obstruction of the ACOG, there aren't that many places in this country that have a full range of options. Many areas are completely deviod of midwives, and most other places require that they only deliver in hospitals, or birth centers attached to hospitals. This can artificially inflate the price of delivery. Anyway, keep an eye on this and any developments in your own communities and states to help or hinder midwifery practices. And remember, our lawmakers need to know that safe, affordable midwifery care is important to us!

Sensitive noses

While not as bad as last time around (when grocery shopping made me nauseated), my sense of smell is still much keener than normal, which leads to some problems. I'm fortunate enough that strong smells aren't causing nausea, but it's still not fun. Which leads to today's gripe: husbands who just don't get it. Last time, every time we went out for (turkey) burgers and fries, I wouldn't let my husband order garlic fries because the smell was just too overpowering. He'd grumble every time, but he'd comply. So I'm trying to be nicer this time, which has just resulted in misery for me. We went out last night. He ordered garlic fries. This morning I still couldn't kiss him. Which made him mad, but sorry, that's the price you pay for twenty minutes of garlic-eating. To be fair, I also can totally smell the garlic on my son's breath when he's been eating garlic, too, but at nineteen months, his breath isn't that bad and I can only smell it when we're nose to nose, instead of across the room, or all night long in bed. Ugh. Ironically, perfumes I kind of like being able to smell more, it helps to hide all of the people in a movie theater who have BO or similarly stinky breath.

Big Ultrasound

And, it's a GIRL!!! And our due date is officially 8/19/10. They changed it after the last ultrasound, but my midwives didn't accept the change. It shouldn't make a difference as long as BabyGirl is around on time. Anyway, it was fun spending an hour looking at the baby and seeing her, although the only thing I really cared about was the gender (since prior ultrasound showed everything as it should be). As much as I love my boy, I'm a girly girl (heck, look at my avatar) and would very much like a daughter to share it with. A daughter who agrees that pink is the best color ever and understands why my purse matches my stand mixer. But don't worry, she should also be able to kick a** if provoked. I may be the picture of femininity, but don't mess with me, either. This also brings up a whole host of other issues dealing with societal treatment of women that I will now have to navagate to raise a confident, secure lady. Sigh, nobody said it would be easy.

Breastfeeding support at work

SEC. 4207. REASONABLE BREAK TIME FOR NURSING MOTH2
ERS.
3 Section 7 of the Fair Labor Standards Act of 1938
4 (29 U.S.C. 207) is amended by adding at the end the fol5
lowing:
6 ‘‘(r)(1) An employer shall provide—
7 ‘‘(A) a reasonable break time for an employee to
8 express breast milk for her nursing child for 1 year
9 after the child’s birth each time such employee has
10 need to express the milk; and
11 ‘‘(B) a place, other than a bathroom, that is
12 shielded from view and free from intrusion from co13
workers and the public, which may be used by an em14
ployee to express breast milk.
15 ‘‘(2) An employer shall not be required to compensate
16 an employee receiving reasonable break time under para17
graph (1) for any work time spent for such purpose.
18 ‘‘(3) An employer that employs less than 50 employees
19 shall not be subject to the requirements of this subsection,
20 if such requirements would impose an undue hardship by
21 causing the employer significant difficulty or expense when
22 considered in relation to the size, financial resources, na23
ture, or structure of the employer’s business.
24 ‘‘(4) Nothing in this subsection shall preempt a State
25 law that provides greater protections to employees than the
26 protections provided for under this subsection.’’.

Yes, I went through the healthcare omnibus to find this for you, my loyal readers. If you work for a company employing at least 50 people, you are now given the right to pump at work in a private area, not a bathroom, as is necessary to you, for a year after giving birth. Now they just to extend that to all employers. And add some paid maternity leave. If I ever run for public office I am so making this part of my platform!

Another bad night

I'm worn out and exhausted after spending last night on the floor of my son's room so my husband could get a decent night's sleep. #1 was up every twenty minutes for a few hours, his poor mouth in pain. Unfortunately, he'd had his full dose of Motrin, so there wasn't anything I could do for him but hold him and rock him back to sleep.

I started looking through the health care omnibus, yes, all 2000+ pages for stuff that will affect you positively. It's taking a while to find anything relevant, but I will prevail and hopefully have something more interesting tomorrow other than another complaint about teething. At least my husband doesn't have any big meetings tomorrow, so I can sleep in my own bed.

Breast health

As you get closer to the end of your pregnancy, and closer to breastfeeding there are a few things to remember to make life a little easier on you and Baby. First of all, get rid of the underwire bras (unless it's impossible due to your size). Underwires can cut into your milk ducts funny impeding supply and even causing plugged ducts. Plus, so much more comfortable for sore breasts to be in soft cups. If you have larger breasts it will be more difficult to find them (last time around my department stores had about three styles, combined, and that was only for a C cup), but worth it.

Secondly, quit using soap on your breasts. Or lotion, or powder or anything except for nipple cream, if necessary. How would you like it if your food tasted like Chanel #5? Right now your nipples and the vicinity are producing oils (you may have broken out, or at least noticed the increase) that serve to clean and lubricate the area. Let your body take care of itself and just use water in the last month or so of pregnancy and after birth.

Speaking of wet, once you start breastfeeding, allow your breasts to air dry as much as possible. You can get yeast infections on your nipples (and in Baby's mouth) which are really hard to clear up. Proper drying can help prevent this. My midwives recommend going around topless as much as possible. I kept a burp cloth around for leakage, but tried to keep them bare (just ask the neighbors!). Obviously, this only works around the home, or at the beaches in Europe, but certainly in the evenings you can at least go braless. Also make sure to change the bra pads frequently. I bought reusable cotton ones, which worked great and I could just wash out in the sink in the evening (I bought a dozen pairs, so eventually they just went in the wash whenever I did a load). At night I slept on my back or side with a burp cloth over my breasts, which worked really well and was so much more comfortable than sleeping in a nursing bra. And I leaked a lot, until about a month after I stopped breastfeeding.

Breastfeeding books, of course, also have a ton of information, but here's the basics to start thinking about.

Breastfeeding article

Morning bonus: http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/04/05/breastfeeding.costs/index.html?hpt=Sbin

Overwhelmed and underrested

I'm having one of those weekends: #1 is cutting a tooth (his seventeenth, at eighteen months, oy!) and not sleeping (he finally slept from 5am to 6:30am in bed with us this morning after getting up four times in pain), taxes are due but I'm not getting any time to do them, my responsibilities as condo board prez are crushing and overwhelming and I'm all on my own with them. Unfortunately, it means I'm also taking stuff out on my husband, but he spent most of the weekend outside doing yard work, by choice, so I'm not feeling all that charitable toward him for not giving me much of a break. At least it's only second trimester. I'm near tears (okay, actually I had a little cry this afternoon, but I'll blame it on the YouTube videos I was watching at the time), but I'm sort of holding it together. I don't think I have any words of wisdom tonight, other than, don't let this be you :)

Easter Egg Hunt

The last time I went to an Easter Egg Hunt, my brother was a baby (he's now in his late twenties) and it was at a big park with tons of chocolate eggs to find. It took a while and there was plenty for everyone. This morning I attempted to take #1 to a hunt at the local grocery store. We arrived seven minutes late (my husband let me oversleep) and the kids were already going home. With grocery bags full of plastic eggs. How times have changed. Apparently, it's now a pushing, grabbing, greed contest instead of a fun time looking for hidden objects. A very nice little boy offered my son some of his eggs (I let my son choose one, and promptly took the candy part away when he wasn't paying attention), but that was the only bit of manners I could see. Even the line to take a picture with the Easter bunny was full of people cutting and pushing others out of their way (adults, not the kids; half of them were terrified of the giant bunny). We did at least get our picture, and certainly my son didn't know what he had missed out on, but I worry for the future, both for children in general and for my children: not wanting them to act or think that acting that way is acceptable.

Eating Fish

http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancyhealth/fishmercury.htm

Our usual diet consists of a protein (chicken, turkey or fish) with some type of grain: rice, tortilla, pasta. So Passover becomes a bit of a challenge since I can't really do a stir-fry or pasta dish. I end up eating a ton of fish (salmon, gefilte fish, canned tuna, gefilte fish, etc.). After realizing that I'm eating fish up to twice a day, I thought maybe I should remind myself of the forbidden ones due to mercury. Gefilte fish doesn't seem to be on there (what, it's not a separate species? okay, the ingredients are on the low list). I am eating too much canned tuna (I gave up the real stuff, particularly because I prefer it still flopping on the plate) due to insane cravings for anything with mayonnaise (which I don't usually like); mainly tuna fish sandwiches, although I'm looking forward to the post-egg-hunt devilled eggs on Sunday a little too much.

The list above is a good reminder to branch out, a lot. The bigger problem is that my husband likes salmon, and that's pretty much it. I'll eat anything from the sea (except sea urchins, they're pretty gross both cooked and raw), so I need to get a little more creative, which is exactly what any pregnant woman wants to hear: more work! Point is: the more variety in your diet, the better both for getting maximum nutrients and for keeping the bad stuff low. Oh, and make sure to compare the mercury list with the safe fish list (so stay away from things like farmed or Atlantic salmon!). So here's a freebie for you: http://www.montereybayaquarium.org/cr/cr_seafoodwatch/sfw_recommendations.aspx

Book recommendations!

I've had a couple of questions about books from readers, so I thought I'd talk about that tonight. Here's another don't do what I did: I burned out on pregnancy books and then didn't read any baby books until #1 was already born. You will be too exhausted to read baby books at that point, so please read them BEFORE giving birth. You're not going to remember a lot of it, but enough should stick to be helpful.

Pregnancy books: I just loved Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy. It was a fun, easy read that really covered the down and dirty stuff with a sense of humor. One criticism that I've read about it is that the author is too open to C-sections and pain meds. That's her choice, but I didn't feel like it took anything away from the book. I like that she is completely non-judgemental, even I don't agree with some of her choices. I've heard scary things about the What to Expect books so I skipped them. I really don't want to read about infinitesimal things that can go horribly wrong unless I'm actually at risk. I'm usually in favor of over-education, but when it comes to some stuff, knowing too much will just keep you up at night. I have enough that already does that. I also checked out a book on home births from the library that I enjoyed, but it was British and not terribly applicable. Do go to the library, you don't need to buy a bunch of pregnancy books and sometimes they also have them in the charity sales (my GGTP was $.25).

Labor books: Bradley method. These were the only ones I read (and honestly, I didn't read them all the way through). Natural Birth the Bradley Way by Susan McCutcheon-Rosegg, Erick Ingraham, and Robert A. Bradley and Husband-Coached Childbirth by Robert A. Bradley, Marjie Hathaway, Jay Hathaway, and James Hathaway plus the workbook that comes with the course (actually, the books do, too, so if you're going to sign up for the class, you don't need to buy them separately). The second one should be read by your partner, too.

Postpartum: The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding by La Leche League International. Please read this before giving birth. The only thing I didn't like about the book is that it makes everything seem so easy when it isn't necessarily. There is NOTHING wrong with you if you have problems with breastfeeding! But there are tons of great tips and advice and overall it's a great resource to have.

Baby Books: the two books I liked the best are The Baby Whisperer Solves all of Your Problems by Tracy Hogg and Melinda Blau and The Baby Book by Dr. William Sears. The Baby Whisperer is fantastic in figuring out routines (like don't let your baby sleep for more than two hours at a time during the day, this revolutionized our lives) and how much food, sleep, etc. is needed at what age. She also doesn't like "Crying it Out" for getting a baby to sleep (which I am against) so more points for her. Dr. Sears is THE baby expert and also into attachment parenting, so I strongly identify with him and his ideas. There is also just a lot of basic information. The book is 600+ pages, so I still haven't gotten anywhere close to through with it, but it was also extremely helpful in figuring out why Baby is crying type questions.

My husband read Happiest Baby on the Block and Happiest Toddler on the Block by Harvey Karp which were also lifesavers in getting Baby to sleep when he was teeny tiny. I haven't read them yet, but they're next on my list. The toddler one is working well for my husband communicating with our Terrible Toddler, which is why I need to read it soon!

I've read most of the Baby 411 and Toddler 411 books by Denise Fields and Ari Brown, M.D. but I'm not a huge fan. They're great for straight information on a lot of stuff, but I don't agree with the child-rearing advice. So I suppose useful for when you don't want to slog through the encyclopedia that is Dr. Brown. She also wrote the Baby Bargains book which is mainly useful if you're tempted to buy a ton of baby stuff. I wasn't so it was more useful in explaining to Daddy why the toys he loved as a baby (bouncy seat, walker) are actually death traps that our children won't have.

For partner: Besides the Happiest books above, my husband really likes the series by Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash, The Expectant Father, the New Father, and Fathering your Toddler.

There are hundreds of books out there to peruse. These are merely the ones that I've found or have been recommended to me that I thought were helpful, I hope that they're helpful to you, too.

Before the baby comes

I don't remember if I've written about this before or not, so bear with me if you get a sense of deja vu. While life eventually reaches a settled place after Baby is born, it could be months before you start feeling as though you can handle any tasks outside of basic survival for you and your family. This is why it is SO important to get as much stuff done well before your due date. Things like moving, painting, landscaping, starting a new business; none of this should be contenplated post partum. Our plan for our first baby was buy a house BEFORE getting pregnant (done, I went off of birth control the week after we moved) and get all decorating, painting, planting, etc. done before the baby came. It mostly worked out. We spent the first few months painting (we like color), the summer working on the yard (first baby was born the beginning of September). Unfortunately, we were so busy, that it wasn't until the first weekend in September that we finally finished our list. That weekend we had a garage sale, my husband got his bike serviced, I took the cat to the vet and bought three months worth of food and litter for her, did five loads of laundry, my husband also mowed, weed wacked and stained our new fence (that he had built a couple of weeks before). Then I went into labor. I never had a second to relax (the crazy job didn't help at all with this).

This time around, we have until the end of June to get everything done so I have two months to relax. This means that we've been landscaping like crazy (it's never really done, and we have a tiny backyard, too!). The next project is built-in bookcases for our living room. Then we need to furnish #1's room with new furniture so we can move his baby stuff into the new nursery (at least it's already painted!). There will always be last minute stuff to take care of, but I am bound and determined to enjoy the most miserable part of THIS pregnancy!

Another reminder to eat local and know your food sources

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/03/29/AR2010032903824.html?hpid=topnews

As if we didn't have enough to worry about with the food supply, apparently manufacturers and suppliers sometimes lie about the content of the food such as type of fish or diluting honey or olive oil. Not quite as bad as putting melamine in baby formula, but who wants to pay premium prices for adulterated wine? Of course this goes back to knowing where your food comes from, at least as much as possible. You have a lot more control over what you eat when you know the farmer who grew your strawberries instead of going to the store and buying a bag of frozen fruit. There is only so much you can source locally, but the nation's reliance on packaged convenience foods doesn't help the problem.

Happy Passover

Religion can be a contentious topic. Growing up, we didn't really do it. My dad is a confirmed atheist, my mother is Jewish. We were raised sort of Jewish. We did (some of) the important holidays (Passover, Rosh Hashannah and Yom Kippur) but never went to synagogue. It wasn't until I went to college (with a very large minority of Jews) that I really began learning about my religion. I still have a long, long way to go, but it's really important to me that my children have a strong religious upbringing. It's okay if they rebel and reject (some of) it, but I at least want them to have the choice rather than feeling like they're playing catch-up the rest of their lives. Ironically, I had to marry a strong Lutheran in order to find a partner who both understood and respected my level of religion. I think a big part of raising a family is trying to do things differently than how you were raised, changing things to what you think would have made you happier. I'm going to screw some stuff up, but I'd like to think that I'll also learn and adjust. I'll make mistakes, but at least I hope to make different ones than my parents did.

Water

Something that I struggle with constantly is getting enough fluids. I'm basically built like a camel (not externally!) and feel fine with a minimum of fluids. I have little doubt that this contributed to my supply issues when breastfeeding #1 besides just not being good for me. It's recommended that during pregnancy a woman should consume 8-10 8 ounce glasses of water a day (64-80 ounces or more than half a gallon). I usually get about 48 ounces of fluid in me. The friends that I have talked to about how much water they drink while pregnant/breastfeeding tend to drink even more (up to a gallon). So I'm working on it. I'm using a liter bottle to gauge how much I'm drinking, and so far have been getting about a liter to a liter and a half a day, besides the pint of milk I drink with breakfast. The goal is to be up to three liters a day by the time I give birth and then keep up with at least that after. If anyone has any suggestions for getting more fluids in, I'm all ears!

Another reminder to take care of YOU

My husband and I haven't gone out on a date since Valentine's Day, mainly due to my back being wack for a month. So we finally did have a date night tonight. We really needed it. Pregnancy is tough, but a new baby is even tougher. It is so important (I cannot stress this enough) to get some couple time and "me" time. This past week I've been making a concerted effort to take a little more pampering time for myself in the morning. (needless to say, the full makeup routine has gone by the wayside in the last couple of months) One morning I gave myself a pedicure (ie: cut my tonails). Another I did a face mask. And so on. I used to spend every Sunday evening doing full manicure, facial, hair, etc.; that hasn't happened since my first pregnancy. My husband is always reminding me to do things incrementally, that stuff will get done if I break it up to fit in the time I have rather than waiting until I have large chunks of time together. And he's mainly right. So I don't get to spend an hour or more pampering myself, at least I can make sure that my legs are shaved more than once a month. Oh, and tonight I did have a little more time, which coinsided with a big Sephora give-away, hurray for multi-tasking!

Upper body strength

Continuing with my theme of exercise for the week, one part of the body that is missed by most prenatal exercise guides is the upper body. Not necessary for pushing out a baby, nobody remembers that after birth, you'll need to carry your baby. All of the time (for some). You cannot hold, hug, cuddle or love on a baby too much. You cannot spoil an infant. The only way they can be comforted and feel secure is to be held. Which means that your arms had better be up for it! Infants are easy enough, it's when they start getting bigger that there are problems (like if you have a baby in the 90th percentile for weight). Contrary to old wives tales, your strength may not grow at the rate your child does. Particularly if you're exhausted from frequent wakings and breastfeeding full time. So yet another thing to add to the start now program. Once your baby is born, use the child as a weight: lift Baby over your head, do chest presses with Baby, etc. They get a kick out of this, too.

PS-If you posted a comment yesterday, I think I accidentally erased it. I'm not seeing them posted, so could you check for them? Thanks!

Squats*

*I KNOW you know what these are!

One of the best positions to give birth in is squatting. It allows the pelvis to open up about 10% more than in any other position and also gets full participation from gravity. However, since the pushing phase can last a few hours, don't expect to just squat down when you're ready to deliver. You need to practice starting yesterday. No, no, no, don't get discouraged, starting today :). If you already have a child, chances are you squat down quite a bit to get down to his or her level on a daily basis. Yes, this is one area where I have drastically improved since last time around!

You can start small, you just want to be able to increase your stamina by the time your due date rolls around. (I could go look up the information in my Bradley book for their guidelines, but it's upstairs and I'm lazy, instead, go sign up for a Bradley class)

If you are planning on giving birth in a hospital, make sure to ask if they have squat bars. These are medieval-looking contraptions that allow for a bar to be secured at the base of the labor bed so you can squat down there. (Don't get me started on why they just won't let you squat on the floor instead of balancing precariously on the edge of a narrow bed) A lot of hospitals do have them now. Of course, you could always just stay off the bed during the long stretches of time when nobody is bothering to check on you anyway. Birth centers and home births won't have any problems with this.

Kegels*

Before I had my first child (I know, a common refrain), I was the Kegel champ. Before starting Bradley classes, I was doing 50 a day. With the classes I was up to 200. I never really experienced the "pregnancy bladder". Then came childbirth. (yes, I know, I pushed too hard) It was difficult to do Kegels after, so I let them slack off. Big mistake. I am now making up for it. Sneeze in the wrong position: pee in my pants. Wait to long to go to the bathroom: pee in my pants. Try showing my son how to hopscotch: that last hop was just a bit too much pressure on my sensitive muscles. My biggest problem is remembering to do them, I used to practice on my daily commute. I'd start as I was getting on the highway and usually be able to finish by the time I hit my first traffic jam (I had a really nasty commute). I am every thankful that I do not have that commute anymore, but scheduling Kegels is more difficult. But it is something that I MUST do, or I will end up in a Depends commercial.

Don't be like me: DO YOUR KEGELS!!!

*just in case you don't know, Kegels are the exercise that flexes your pelvic floor muscles: it's the action used to stop the flow of urine when you're going to the bathroom.

More on C-sections

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/03/24/health/24birth.html?ref=health

Yet another study has come out sounding the alarm of the ridiculously high rate of C-sections in this country. Unfortunately, the article barely talks about ways to prevent this (such as not having an induction), although it mentions some of the contributing factors (fear of malpractice suits being the big one).

A really important way to help prevent an unnecessary C-section is to check out the rates of your ob and hospital (if that's the route you're going, the best way, of course, if you are low-risk, is to have a midwife). If either or both of them have higher rates (30%+) then you need to discuss this, in depth, with your ob. Which, if you have a good practice, you should be doing anyway. Other ways are to try and avoid an induction and having a natural childbirth. Every time there is an intervention, it can lead to more. And stay at home as long as possible, the less time that you're in the hospital, the less time there is for interventions! (just don't wait until you feel the urge to push :) )

Eat Real Food

If you watch TV, you've probably seen the ads from the CORN INDUSTRY saying how High Fructose Corn Syrup is just regular sugar and it's not bad for you any more than sugar is. Until some scientists compare the effects. A study was just released from Princeton showing that oh, yes, HFCS does much worse things to your body than sugar does. (yes, this was done in rats, not humans, but startling just the same) I highly recommend taking a couple of minutes to read the synopsis: http://www.princeton.edu/main/news/archive/S26/91/22K07/index.xml?section=topstories

While it seems as though HFCS is in nearly everything, if you eliminate a lot of the processed foods that Americans seem to love so much, it isn't that hard to do. I have managed to virtually eliminate it (except for the nasty sports drinks I still have to consume) in the last couple of years. Also, enough cities now have laws that require chain restaurants to post nutritional information that you can find a lot of it on-line. Another way to educate yourself about what you're eating (basically, stay away from chains!). Restaurants that have rotating menus and advertise fresh ingredients are better bets, usually. A hilarious rule of thumb is that if your great-grandmother (whom we'll assume was a globe-trotting, adventurous eater) wouldn't recognize it, don't eat it. :)

Toxins in beauty products? Check out this blog.

http://notjustaprettyface.org/

I was forwarded this blog last week and finally had a chance to read the first page. Not bad.

Heath Care Reform

A small break for a political (although it shouldn't be) message. I'm spending today watching C-SPAN for the debate over health care. I support the bill for a variety of reasons. It is not the bill I wanted, I don't think it goes far enough. I would like nothing less than for health insurance (actually, all insurance companies) to be not for profit, either by changing how companies do business or by the government taking over completely (my ideal). I would like reimbursements to be determined by best practices rather than by professional organizations, shareholders and profit margins. And, of course, I would like alternative births to be encouraged. Studies show that low-risk women have better outcomes with midwives than with obs yet many insurance plans (mine included) do not cover midwives and/or out-of-hospital births. We live in one of the richest countries in the world, it is a moral outrage that we can't take care of our own citizens. (Respectful opinions welcomed!)

I'm tired! (Yeah, it's a Friday)

I'm feeling uninspired tonight. Hmm . . . oh, my back is about better, thanks to physical therapy! Yeah, not much else. And tomorrow we're throwing a party, so probably won't have a post. Sometimes resolving to do something every day doesn't mean that you'll do it well every day, right? :)

Birth Story for first baby

I think it's about time to share with you my birth story from my first baby. I love it so much, I had such a fantastic birth. Yes, it was an easier birth, but please don't think that my support of natural, out-of-hospital births would be any less if it were harder. This was a path I chose assuming that I would have a long, long first labor. (And I had a difficult pregnancy and postpartum, so it more than evened out!) (I wrote this for a previous on-line post)

First things first: #1 was born at 3:21am on 9/8/08 weighing in at 7 lbs, 12 oz and 20 inches long.

Secondly, I just want to say how proud I am of my husband. When we first started talking about getting pg, he was all about a medicated, hospital birth and couldn’t imagine anything else. With all that we went through, he did a full 180 and was 100% behind a natural childbirth in a birth center. And after the birth, he is 110% behind a home birth next time. I’m just so lucky to have a man who can grow and change and not get stuck in his own ideas without considering other options.

Okay, here are the details, up close and personal. I don’t think there’s anything that will scare the potential breeders. It really all started early Sunday morning. I woke up for my one am potty break and saw there was some spotting (bloody show), evidence that my cervix was dilating. Since I’m with a midwife practice, they don’t do any internal checks since you can start effacing or dilating weeks before giving birth and that can just give a false sense of urgency. I was a bit excited, but also knew that this just meant something was happening, not that something was happening soon. I woke up at six am to more bloody show, but no cramping or contractions, so I suppressed my excitement (a bit) and went on with my day (garage sale! Yeah, we really live it up here).

The day was busy and around six I was catching up with a friend in DC on the phone. After about an hour of talking to her, I realized I’d been having contractions the entire time. Not necessarily a bit deal, since I’d been having Braxton-Hicks for about two months. I decided to let her go and start timing with the stop watch we’d finally bought three days before. My husband came inside from mowing the lawn a little bit later to my announcement that I was having light, painless contractions 8-14 minutes apart. We decided to have dinner and see if they would stop. We ate, the contractions continued, but didn’t speed up or get any more intense. We discussed my husband working from home the next day, but decided to see how I would feel the next morning. I took a warm shower and the contractions finally did stop. I thought I was going to be fine, and would be able to go into work the next day and get a few things done.

When I woke up for my first potty break, I realized that I’d had a few contractions, but I thought it was the middle of the night, so I could probably just go back to sleep. Then I looked at the clock. I had been in bed for less than an hour and had had several mild contractions. This was not false labor. I wanted to let my husband get as much sleep as possible, so I just lay there for a while, the contractions starting to get more intense and some back pain with them. Baby was also moving non-stop in between contractions, so there was no chance of me sleeping between them. I made an effort to relax during and between, rubbing the small of my back when it was hurting. It wasn’t much longer when I needed to start vocalizing to help me get through the contractions. They hurt, but they weren’t so bad that I couldn’t cope. But the moaning finally woke my husband up. At first he thought I was just moaning in my sleep, but soon realized I was wide awake. As soon as he was up, I told him to go get the Bradley book so I could see where I was. He couldn’t find that, or the midwife manual, so I got up to go look in the nursery. I made it in there just in time to drop to all fours for the next contraction. As soon as it was over, I felt nauseated and rapidly went to the bathroom to get sick. I crawled into the tub and had my husband call the midwife. Getting into the tub was fantastic. I turned on the water for each contraction and just had it run over me. Sitting there wasn’t terribly comfortable, but the running water made up for it. My cat also sat on the edge of the tub with me, worried about what was going on. Considering what a pain she normally is, it was so touching to see her worried about me.

It was around 1am when we got in touch with the midwife. She listened to me have a contraction, determining that I was in active labor (you think?) and told us she’d meet us at the birth center at 2am. I couldn’t imagine waiting that long! My husband ran around to get everything into the car. Then I hit transition. I let out a scream for that first one, not realizing that it was transition. But the first one was by far the worst, and staying in the tub calmed me down. When I was time to leave, I didn’t want to. I was worried that by changing position and getting out of the tub that I’d be in more pain. What I was dealing with was still within the realm of coping, but I wasn’t sure how much more I could take. Then I started to feel a small urge to push. My husband: “We are going RIGHT NOW!”

I finished the contraction, threw on underwear and a robe, and he got me down to the car in record time. Fortunately, the contractions slowed down and were much easier in the car. My husband would only go 5 miles over the speed limit, mentally getting ready to have to explain to a cop if we got pulled over. Fortunately, someone else was pulled over ahead of us and we made it to the Birth Center in about 15 minutes. I walked in the door, meeting my midwife and her two assistants with “I’m ready, now!” They thought this was amusing, until they checked me. The women got me into the room, soft music playing and candles lit, while My husband got our bags out of the car. I lay down in the bed and felt much better. I was so exhausted, all I wanted to do was rest. They had the tub ready for me since I had originally planned for a water birth, but laying on my side was so comfortable. Then they checked me, and could see the baby’s head. I was ready to push, so they told me to go ahead and listen to my body. My husband kneeled by the bed and I held (squeezed) his fingers. I had one assistant at my head, putting cool compresses on my forehead and rubbing my back and arms. I had one assistant putting warm compresses on my perineum and holding my leg up with each push. The midwife oversaw everything and made sure that I had a drink of water during each break. I pushed with each contraction and rested in between. The rest made such a difference in my stamina. I was refreshed and (somewhat) ready to go each time. The pushing was really intense, but it wasn’t nearly as painful as I thought it would be. The first couple I was vocalizing really loudly and the midwife told me to take that energy and use it to push instead, keeping the vocalizations lower in my chest. This made pushing so much more effective. About fifteen minutes before birth, my water finally broke. The feeling was actually quite nice, with the rush of liquid feeling comforting. I had completely forgotten about it so I was surprised when it happened. Before I knew it, I could feel Baby’s head. I wanted him out! He started to crown with one push and I felt him slide back inside. I said, “No, I want you out now!” and the midwife told me it was okay, give myself some time to stretch. Well, I was ready to push a few more times, but I could feel his head coming out with the next push, so I just kept going and my husband was right there when I pushed him out entirely at once. It was so fast, there wasn’t even time for a picture. My husband put him on my belly and my son and I looked at each other for the first time. As soon as I could talk, all I could say was “That was it? I could totally do this a few more times!”

Because he came so fast, and his hand was up near his head, I did have a second degree tear that required stitches, but I didn’t (and never did) feel that. I also had a nasty hematoma (like a blood blister). And I lost a lot of blood, making me really light-headed any time I stood up for the first day. But I am so happy with how the birth turned out. A little extra healing time is so worth how easy labor was. I was fully prepared for a multi-day marathon and instead ran the marathon in a sprint. I took Bradley Method classes beforehand, and while I forgot half of it during labor, I feel as though they had me fully prepared on what to expect at each stage. What I took away from them that helped the most was trying to relax as much as possible during labor. I feel like it made a world of difference in my stamina and the level of pain. And also for the general philosophy of this is what our body is made to do, so we can handle it. While I know that natural childbirth isn’t for everyone, I really do encourage everyone to at least explore if it is an option.