Monday, March 29, 2010
Happy Passover
Religion can be a contentious topic. Growing up, we didn't really do it. My dad is a confirmed atheist, my mother is Jewish. We were raised sort of Jewish. We did (some of) the important holidays (Passover, Rosh Hashannah and Yom Kippur) but never went to synagogue. It wasn't until I went to college (with a very large minority of Jews) that I really began learning about my religion. I still have a long, long way to go, but it's really important to me that my children have a strong religious upbringing. It's okay if they rebel and reject (some of) it, but I at least want them to have the choice rather than feeling like they're playing catch-up the rest of their lives. Ironically, I had to marry a strong Lutheran in order to find a partner who both understood and respected my level of religion. I think a big part of raising a family is trying to do things differently than how you were raised, changing things to what you think would have made you happier. I'm going to screw some stuff up, but I'd like to think that I'll also learn and adjust. I'll make mistakes, but at least I hope to make different ones than my parents did.
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So have you decided how the children will be raised? Jewish or Lutheran? A mix of both? Traditionally, if the mother is Jewish, the children are. Apparently, the same is true for Druze. Shadi's mother was raised Druze, but his father was raised Maronite, which is a type of Catholic. I guess Shadi was raised in an Arabic Catholic church, and I was raised in a Roman Catholic church. His father started working weekends and eventually they just stopped going to church. Me personally, I lost my faith when I was 7, but was forced to go to church every weekend. It was even in my parents divorce settlement.
ReplyDeleteNow, Shadi and I have decided that we will let the idea of religion be up to our children. If they want to go to church, we'll take them. Same with a synagogue, temple, mosque, or even the forest to worship the moon if they so wish. We both consider ourselves Atheists, but wont pressure our children either way. I'm sure my mother will be hounding the kids, and me, to go to church (she is convinced I'll go back to the church), but we'll sit down, tell them our views and why, and let them make their own choice.
I always thought the Jewish faith was interesting. There is so much more to being Jewish than just a faith. It always fascinated me when my dad was "married" to his second wife, who was Jewish. I enjoyed the holidays and the traditions we were keeping alive. Will you send your children to Hebrew school? My friend is Atheist, but her mother's family is Jewish. She loves Passover, Rosh Hashannah and Yom Kippur and enjoys celebrating it, but I don't even think she considers herself ethnically Jewish. It's strange.
Since Christians can always convert more and Jews not so much (and people keep trying to wipe us off of the earth), the children are being raised more Jewish than not. It helps that neither one of us has found a house of worship yet, my big drawback being that synagogues are ridiculously expensive to join (because all Jews are wealthy, right?). Part of my thinking is also, it's easier to keep Kosher than to start keeping Kosher, so we celebrate what I know and if the children don't want to continue when they're older, that's their choice. At the very least I hope they keep up with the cultural parts.
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